March Madness B2, Rd 2 - Panzer wins 101!

Our Mystery Card games - The '70s Game, Back to the '80s, Back to the '90s

Pistols at Dawn? You Need My Help!

Postby Semper Gumby » Mon Aug 07, 2006 6:48 pm

As the resident gun toting Marine, I offer the following for those planning to duel in the morning.

1. Bring a gun. Preferably, bring at least two guns. Bring all of your friends who have guns.

2. [b:efa35964c4]Anything worth shooting is worth shooting twice. Ammo is cheap - life is expensive.[/b:efa35964c4]

3. Only hits count. The only thing worse than a miss is a slow miss.

4. If your shooting stance is good, you're probably not moving fast enough or using cover correctly.

5. Move away from your attacker. Distance is your friend. (Lateral and diagonal movement are preferred.)

6. If you can choose what to bring to a gunfight, bring a long gun and a friend with a long gun.

7. [b:efa35964c4]In ten years nobody will remember the details of caliber, stance, or tactics. They will only remember who lived.[/b:efa35964c4]

8. [b:efa35964c4]If you are not shooting, you should be communicating, reloading, and running.[/b:efa35964c4]

9. Accuracy is relative: most combat shooting standards will be more dependent on "pucker factor" than the inherent accuracy of the gun. Use a gun that works EVERY TIME. "All skill is in vain when an Angel blows the powder from the flintlock of your musket."

10. Someday someone may kill you with your own gun, but they should have to beat you to death with it because it is empty.

11. Always cheat, always win. The only unfair fight is the one you lose.

12. Have a plan.

13. [b:efa35964c4]Have a back-up plan, because the first one won't work.[/b:efa35964c4]

14. Use cover or concealment as much as possible.

15. Flank your adversary when possible. Protect yours.

16. Don't drop your guard.

17. Always tactical load and threat scan 360 degrees.

18. Watch their hands. Hands kill. (In God we trust. Everyone else, keep your hands where I can see them.)

19. Decide to be aggressive ENOUGH, quickly ENOUGH.

20. The faster you finish the fight, the less shot you will get.

21. [b:efa35964c4]Be polite. Be professional. But, have a plan to kill everyone you meet.[/b:efa35964c4]

22. Be courteous to everyone, friendly to no one.

23. Your number one option for personal security is a lifelong commitment to avoidance, deterrence, and de-escalation.

24. Do not attend a gun fight with a handgun, the caliber of which does not start with anything smaller than "4".

25. [b:efa35964c4]You can't miss fast enough to win.[/b:efa35964c4]

:D
Semper Gumby
 
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Postby Panzer ace » Mon Aug 07, 2006 7:06 pm

That was great Semper. :lol: One of the best posts we've had. Next time I have a duel, I will remember, why bring one 88mm when two is better... 8)
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Postby Jimmy_C » Mon Aug 07, 2006 7:14 pm

Semper...loved it man.

I'm sorta hoping that I can call you up to come down and support me for the next duel I get into. :D
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Postby 1st Command Commando » Tue Aug 08, 2006 5:04 am

Shucks, I'll just call in some close air support. A couple of Wild Weasels to suppress the SAMs or 88mms, a couple of A-10s to silence the Panzer (PA, I say this with utmost respect, normally I'd only task one A-10 to take out a tank), and maybe a B-52 to silence the ground pounders and Marines! Go Air Force (and their beautiful, air-conditioned clubs and dormitories!)

C'mon Raines and Wilson!!! One game out of the last playoff spot.
Sog
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Secret Weapon

Postby Semper Gumby » Tue Aug 08, 2006 8:25 am

I'd send one golf club sales chick with the new BIG BERTHA to the airfield and that would stop the whole air war campaign. :D

Otherwise, I'm sure we'll just pray for rain knowing that the Air Force will refrain from getting their "planes" wet. :lol:
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Getting Tight

Postby Semper Gumby » Wed Aug 09, 2006 9:44 am

With nine (9) games to go, I can't recall ever seeing as many owners still plugging at it.

I'm confident HAL will pull or lose a victory for one team with one of the greatest or bonehead mid-game moves.

Otherwise, HAL did a great job ensuring that Alan Trammell didn't play more games than he did in the real world but he forgot to let Doran to hit as well as he did in the real world season.

Is it me or does Andre' Dawson's big 49 HR season underperform? :roll:
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Postby JIMDAKE » Wed Aug 09, 2006 9:54 am

2 games outta 8th with 9 to play. Big 3 game series with BCMgr tonite.
Bullpen freshly & thoroughly thrashed by PA. (On the bright side, Leftie only went 2/3 inning so he's well rested & showered... for his next start against PA). BC gets the "5.0+ twins" Wegman and Alexander. Send the golf club sales chick to BC's place please.
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Postby Jablowmi » Wed Aug 09, 2006 10:33 am

i did a great job reading the cards this season, dumping a 49 HR dawson and a 14-1 leal!
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