In our first installment of the National League SN Rankings, we see our first glimpse of the rankings according to the SYKES system. (Statistical Yearning Kryptic Evaluation System - yes we know “cryptic” is really spelled with a C, but let's get past that for this exercise)
[b:e527af55e1]1. San Francisco Giants (11-7)[/b:e527af55e1] - The Giants are led by their pitching staff that currently sports a nice 2.06 team ERA. The team is batting only a combined .243 thus far, but that is still good enough to take the number one spot in our initial rankings. Mike and Mike (Lacoss and Krukow) lead the way with a 7-1 combined record. Bob Brenly has a team high 5 HR and 17 RBI’s. Overall the team is 20 for 23 on stolen bases, making the most of every opportunity. They are 8-1 on the road which speaks volumes to the hotel accommodations they receive.
[b:e527af55e1]2. San Diego Padres (11-8)[/b:e527af55e1] - The Friars would be higher prior to their recent drubbing by the Giants the last 3 games. The Padres lead the NL in Runs, AVG, SLG, HR, RBI... you get the picture. Four Padre hitters sport double digit RBI’s. Errors plague the team with the Padres allowing 12 unearned runs already this year. Going 9-1 on the road makes for some good television for Padre fans.
[b:e527af55e1]3. New York Mets (13-4)[/b:e527af55e1] - How could the team with the highest winning percentage be listed number 3? Looking beyond their 7-1 record in 1 run games, the Mets lose in style and have given up more runs then they have scored this year. Somehow they have gone 9-1 against south paws this year with Keith Hernandez spanking all pitches thrown to him thus far. The SYKES system may catch up to them eventually and they can expect to cool off unless they can blow out an opponent one day.
[b:e527af55e1]4. Philadelphia Phillies (7-10)[/b:e527af55e1] - Who wouldn’t want Doug Glanville as their coach? His team spirit has kept them going despite their slow start. 5 players have 10 or more RBI’s and runs are a plenty for the team. Bullpen woes need to be handled better as their 0-4 record in 1 run games needs improvement. Perhaps the early beatings issued to their players by Mr. Met will inspire a turn around to make the most of their team’s potential.
[b:e527af55e1]5. Montreal Expos (10-6)[/b:e527af55e1] - Despite grumblings that the league commissioner is also the manager of this team and there may be some “manipulation” of one run games in favor of the Expos, they continue to surprise their opponents. High walk totals for Expos pitchers will catch up to them soon enough, especially against the heavy slugging teams out west. Do we really expect a team playing in Canada to win the whole thing? What’s that all a-boot?
[b:e527af55e1]6. Houston Astros (9-9)[/b:e527af55e1] - With Mike Scott sandpapering his way to a 38 strikeout total thus far with only 2 wins to show for it, we ponder why the Astros aren’t higher on the SYKES food chain. Denny Walling continues to pound in runs for the team, leading in both Home Runs and RBI’s. Will Jim Deshaies ever get his ERA under 10? Will Craig Reynolds ever break the Mendoza line? Will Bob Knepper need to take out a home loan to buy himself some run support? Only time will tell. Maybe they should try smoking some of that fake grass to get this team on a roll.
[b:e527af55e1]7. Pittsburgh Pirates (8-9)[/b:e527af55e1] - Parity anyone? With so many teams hovering 1 game above and below .500, it’s anybody's game for the title of the “head of the middle of the pack”. With the team trying hard to learn how to take a pitch, leadoff hitter Barry Bonds has enlisted the help of a local lab in the bay area to work on his conditioning. His teammate Mike Diaz has a lot of success from BALCO labs and maybe this new found cream will assist the Pirates in climbing back into the NL East race.
[b:e527af55e1]8. Cincinnati Reds (8-8)[/b:e527af55e1] - Despite the 8-8 record, Pete Rose is 14-2 against the spread. John Denny is off to a 3-0 start prompting discussion to open up a restaurant chain. Bill Gullickson has been asked to serve fries to go along with the earned runs he has surrendered so far. Eric Davis is the catalyst at the top of the line up, leading the team with 15 runs and 22 strikeouts. At least he is showing up to play.
[b:e527af55e1]9. St. Louis Cardinals (8-10)[/b:e527af55e1] - Hitting a team combined 8 home runs, the Cards are forced to do most of their work on the base paths. Their 33 steals and 15 caught stealing lead the league in both categories. The Cardinals are only 4-5 in games where Ozzie Smith runs out to the field and does a back flip to start the game. Maybe it’s time to start rolling over instead, although that may not help. (See Braves below)
[b:e527af55e1]10. Chicago Cubs (7-10)[/b:e527af55e1] - The Cubs score tons of runs; however, they give them up too. Jody Davis leads the way for the offense with a team high 4 HR and 14 RBI. The team ERA of 4.99 needs work or they may continue to sit at the “bottom of the middle of the pack”. Defense has been solid, with even Mr. Dunston only committing 2 errors so far this year. Maybe installing some lights and playing a few night games might help.
[b:e527af55e1]11. Los Angeles Dodgers (8-12)[/b:e527af55e1] - The bullpen has been more like a chicken coup as they are quite positively giving up more runs than there are fans left in Dodger Stadium after the 7th inning. Ed Vande Berg has been inhuman in the pen with numbers that defy statistical probabilities. The SYKES system says that the Gods of HAL will catch up to him. Franklin Stubbs leads the team in most offensive categories as well as errors costing runs. The Dodgers have yielded 17 un-earned runs this year. That’s about 27 more than the staff can afford at this stage.
[b:e527af55e1]12. Atlanta Braves (5-12)[/b:e527af55e1] - Without Dale Murphy, the team would be slugging around .320 and might be 1-14. The “Danger_Zane” is doing his part to help the contracts of future National League free agent hitters yet escapes danger and only has 1 loss on the year despite his 7.86 ERA and 1.91 WHIP. Maybe a little less time in the chat rooms and some more time in the bullpen would help him along. Claudell Washington has been caught stealing as many times as the Braves have won games. Vegas odds on an Orioles-Braves world series have just been updated to 3270-to-1, which is also the approximate odds of surviving the navigation of an asteroid field.
[i:e527af55e1]-- Adam DeCicco[/i:e527af55e1]