- Posts: 834
- Joined: Fri Aug 24, 2012 3:02 am
If the MLB insists on having the DH in the National League permanently, which will in effect kill real baseball, then I must demand that they fire all of the human managers and hire chimpanzees instead. Why waste millions paying for human managers. I mean a chimp can manage a DH team and you can have him fill out a lineup card by pointing to pictures of the players. And he's done. No pinch hitting, no substitutions, no decisions to be made just sit back and wait for homers, walks, strikeouts and ground outs into the shift. You don't even need a pitching coach as the pitchers can be replaced automatically when their pitch count is reached even if they are one out away from throwing a perfect game. Sorry but you reached you pitch count....gotta go. And since a full grown chimp is four times as strong as a human it will make for some interesting arguments with the umpires. Maybe the umps wont be so quick to throw someone out of the game if they will get an arm ripped off. I'm not totally against the DH. I think we need it in the American League to show how not to play baseball. The next time I join an ATG DH league I'm going to fire my long time manager Johnny Yuma and hire a chimp. In fact I'll get the chimp from the Beverly Hillbillies. Remember Ellie Mae's chimp? And you know what his name is Skipper so it fits.